all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
No...this little piggys going to the bar
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
