I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
