i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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