you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Terrible idea I love it
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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