Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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