Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize