dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
