I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
i've created a new STD.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
