i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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