fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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