Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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