glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
are you so shy because you have an std?
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
