We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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