Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Four minutes until I can fart!
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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