I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
