She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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