reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
