A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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