??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize