You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
