I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
