How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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