Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
