I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize