I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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