Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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