Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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