ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
if only i could text you this smell
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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