we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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