Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
