Dual....:-)
look no pants
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize