I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
