absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
