My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize