carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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