who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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