I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
