At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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