I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
