hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
