We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Randomize
