why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
