Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
