you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
