sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
your like the ambassador to my penis.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Randomize
