this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
