I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
