she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
