Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
