My sheets look like a crime scene.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
